After mere moments of deliberation, I decide that the best possible option at this stage is to lie my heart out. After all, I may be self-involved, but not enough to murder everyone if it would help me. Plus, I have a terribly stupid plan to get Rochelle and myself out of this mess.
“Ok, but you aren’t going to like the answer.”
The crusted man cocked an eyebrow.
“Really? I dare say that’s a bit of a farfetched assumption.”
“Ok, well, this is the thing. The group meets in Merill, Wisconsin every second Monday. It’s a hell of a trek from here. When you get there you should be able to dig out a flyer or something. I mean, if you can find me you can find that.” I ended my statement with a sigh to further drive the point home.
To the reaction the Crusted man gave, I would assume someone had instead spat into his ear and insisted it was of his command. His eyes bulged ever so slightly while his fingers gripped themselves to confirm this wasn’t a dream.
“But why would you travel all that way for something you knew absolutely nothing about?”
“So we aren’t playing the question game anymore?”
“NO WE ARE NOT PLAYING THE QUESTION GAME ANYMORE!”
“But I liked that game.”
“Too bad. Now answer: why would you travel all that way for something that sounds frankly ridiculous?”
I gestured towards my limp legs. “I was desperate and obsessed. I’ve done worse things for those reasons.”
Apparently insanity fit me to a t, because he accepted that answer without question. He turned to the guard.
“Until I phone back, do not let them out of your sight.”
The guard looked shocked. “Sir, this journey will take days. What of food and shelter for here?”
“There’s camping supplies in the van, I’ll take them out before I leave.”
And so the crusted man unloaded the trunk and strapped himself in.
As the van left for the long trip to a land know to me only as the US bunker of cheese, I shot a grin at Rochelle. After all, my bluff had worked. Rochelle mouthed profanity at me and I had no idea why. After all, I was trying to save us. Speaking of which, we still have one guard to tackle…
In Episode 9, readers voted to Ask Rochelle if she knows how to deal with this
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