Loan Some


In Episode 7, readers voted:”Alexis took one hard look at Vera… And said to Vera, “Hello, Isadora. I’m his wife.

Episode 8

“Hello, Isadora,” said Alexis. “I’m Chip’s wife.”Vera, who was still dressed as Chewie, shot Chip a look. Chip got up from his dead-ant-like position, straightening his Jedi robe and adjusting his ears.
Oh, God, Vera thought. Am I a fake homewrecker? She had never imagined that the person that hired her would be a phony, too.

“Are you going to explain?” said Alexis, with her hands on her hips.

“Understand, you gotta—“

“In non-Jedi speak,” Alexis interrupted.

“We had been growing apart,” he said, in a fairly normal voice, even if he still tended to sound like something from Jim Henson’s Creature Shop. “You never even look at me anymore. You’re so invested in these books. And when the Divergent book series came out, well, crap. I knew I’d never see you anymore.”

“I only got interested in the book series because of you.” Tears swelled up in her eyes. “I know you’ve been playing again. I found Settlers of Catan hidden behind the toilet.”

Chip winced, embarrassed by this revelation.

Vera couldn’t follow half of what either one of them were saying.

“I’m sorry, Lexie.” He paused, collecting his thoughts so he wouldn’t get too emotional. “I’ll get help. I only brought Isadora here to try to make you jealous. She’s no one to me.”

And maybe it was hearing it out loud, but suddenly Vera realized why some people are so apt to quit this job.

Yoda and Hermione hugged, and then started to make out. Vera turned her head away and shut her eyes.

“You know,” said Alexis. “I do approve of some role-playing games.”

“Okay,” said Vera. “That’s enough.”

They both turned to her, with looks as if to say, “You’re still here?” Yoda pulled away from Alexis to speak with Isadora privately.

“I guess you’re off the hook for the rest of your services today,” he said. “I’ll pay you in full. We’ll be in touch.”

He started to walk away, when Vera gave him a big ‘ol tap on his shoulder. Chip turned around to see Chewbacca staring him down and making the “Where’s my money?” mobster gesture with her Muppet hands.

“Fine,” he said. “I’ll tip you, too.”

As Yoda and Hermione walked away, Vera felt like she had actually done something good with her job: bringing a couple on the brink of divorce back together. She’d never done this at the library.

She decided to take off her Chewie helmet and breathe a little. Just as she could feel the cool air hit her face, Cole was back.

“You know you can’t do that,” he said. “You’re supposed to remain in your role until specified.”

“Relax,” she said. “He doesn’t need my services anymore. He’s reunited with his wife.”

“Yoda’s married?” Cole’s face scrunched in a mixture of disgust and morbid curiosity.

“Yes, and thanks to me, he’s reunited with his estranged spouse.”

“Well, good for you. But you still better put that Chewie head back on. You could run into someone you know.”

As Cole and Vera walked toward the exit of the convention, Vera stopped dead in her tracks when she encountered a blast from her not-too-far-back past. It was Jeffrey, her ex-boyfriend that had dumped her because he was too fat. And he was with another girl.


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In Episode 8, readers voted that… Before Vera could respond, Cole took her into his arms and kissed her, diverting the attention from her face.

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